Our wedding day was picture perfect, just like I’ve always imagined it would be. Of course, there was also the usual chaos, nerves, and glitter everywhere. Grant and I put out this cute little card box for people to drop their envelopes in, and just before the ceremony, my mother-in-law, Sharon, offered to keep an eye on it “for safekeeping.” Since she’s family, both Grant and I agreed. What’s most, we were thankful to her for being so thoughtful.
Fast forward to our first dance, and the box wasn’t there anymore. When I asked Sharon about it, she said, “Oh, don’t worry, I put it in my car. I’ll bring it back after brunch.”
Next day, brunch rolled around but the box was still nowhere to be seen. And Sharon? She looked totally unbothered. And then, at one moment, she said she had counted the money and there were $5,000 but she was keeping them because she was more responsible than me and her son. What’s more, she causally mentioned that she had already spent $500 of OUR money on aunt Marlene’s hotel stay.
We asked for the money from the wedding again, but my mother-in-law got angry and left. Both Grant and I just stood there, shocked by her irrational behavior, knowing that arguing with her would be in vain.
We let a couple of days go by before Grant reached out to his mother.
However, since she got even more stubborn about the entire money situation, we decided to flip the script. Grant looked her straight in the eyes and said, “Ok, mom, no money, no baby plans, just like that.”
She took a moment to process what Grant said, and out of nowhere, her “I want to be a grandma” instinct kicked in.
She handed us the money, and she did it with a huge smile on her face.
We deposited it immediately, labeling it our Baby Fund.
What Sharon didn’t understand was that her interference only made us stronger. She was basically the universe’s way of teaching us the importance of boundaries. And yes, while family is wonderful, once you are married, you have to look out for each other first, no questions asked, because no one else gets to write your story.
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