Sue went to the cemetery every day

Sue went to the cemetery every day to water the flowers on the grave of her late husband, Bob.

When she was finished, she always walked backwards as she left the grave.One day, her friend Tammy asked,

Sue, why on earth do you always leave the cemetery walking backwards?”

Sue smiled and said,

“When Bob was alive, he used to tell me, ‘You’ve got such a great ass, it could bring a dead man back to life!’… Well, I’m not taking any chances!”

(Bonus)

There was a husband and his wife sitting next to a drunk in a bar.

Suddenly the drunk stands up and yells, “ATTENTION ALL” and farts loudly.

The wife is extremely embarrassed, and the husband looks at the drunk and says

”Excuse me, you just farted before my wife.”

The drunks replies, ”I’m sorry I didn’t know it was her turn.”

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